


A Little Mayhem (Never Hurt Anyone)

by Sister_Grimm



Category: The Flash (TV 2014)
Genre: Alternate Universe - No Powers, Hurt/Comfort, Implied Past Child Grooming, Lovers to Roommates, M/M, Mental Illness, Oddly Low Angst, Open Relationships, Recovery, past abusive relationships, past drug abuse, referenced domestic violence
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-05-25
Updated: 2018-05-25
Packaged: 2019-05-13 13:28:22
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,073
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14749748
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Sister_Grimm/pseuds/Sister_Grimm
Summary: I hit rock bottomBut that was last autumnnow I'm keeping myself in line





	A Little Mayhem (Never Hurt Anyone)

**Author's Note:**

> Mind the warnings
> 
> The fic for this aesthetic http://notsolittlegirlevenmorelost.tumblr.com/post/174229783229/a-vibebomb-aesthetic-to-go-with-my-latest-fic

Cisco Ramon is not a groupie.

There are however, certain notable exceptions to his "no groupie"-ing policy.

Laurel Lance, for example. If he only ever got to have sex when Laurel Lance was in town he would be ok with that. That is a whole lot of bad ass with a great ass.

Axel Walker is the other notable example, all candy floss and razor's edges with a mouth for fucking sin. Which is why Cisco has lost track of the amount of times they've fallen into bed, couch, bathroom, green room, studio, etc together. Tonight is a bed... Well it's a couch. It's just Axel has been using the couch as a bed since he got out of rehab. Sloppy open mouth kisses and dry humping like they're teenagers before Len and Mick get back. Sara had dragged them to some afterparty thing and Axel had tugged him into an alley way and then a cab and that was how Cisco ended up here, nails raking over bone and lean muscle, about to come in his pants like a teenager.

Which, he does. 

He probably could have stood to think this through a bit.

***

He's out of his glorious glorious _glorious_ bed at 11 am and making coffee with a riff in his head. He thinks it's the bass line to the title track on Black Canary's first EP _Kicking and Screaming_ and in the back of his mind he thinks it would play well with New Year's Day's "Scream". He files that away for after coffee. And almost trips over Beetle who hides behind his guitar.

But once he's got his coffee (in an Iron Man mug Barry gave him for his birthday), he sits down on his computer and pulls up both tracks on the software he uses for remixes. Both are sexy songs and he's right, they have complimentary bass lines. So he pulls on his headphones and loses himself in the music. 

He plays with verse ordering and the bass line and tries to resist the urge to add his usual beep bops because honestly Laurel's voice does not need ornamentation.

His phone vibrates and he turns away from his music for a moment to swipe the screen. It's from Axel _you have a two bedroom right?_

__

__

_Yeah?_

_Need a roommate?_

He doesn't _need_ a roommate but his apartment is expensive and he already works two jobs.

_Yeah_

_How much?_

He pauses and thinks _700_

_K. How soon can I move in?_

_this weekend? ___

__

__

_You're a life saver, Ramon._

______That's great but Cisco might have actually lost it. Beetle is on the arm of his couch now and he addresses the cat directly when he says, "What the fuck was I thinking."_ _ _ _ _ _

______***_ _ _ _ _ _

______Axel is more or less on time. Shows up at ten am with Len and Mick and also Ray Palmer, because reasons? But they have Mick's truck and Axel has less stuff than Cisco might have necessarily expected. Axel is leaning against the wall, wearing a black t-shirt with Fuck You written on the front in block letters. Axel looks different in the daylight, Cisco thinks as though he's never interacted with Axel in the day time. He has obviously, even has a tattoo from Axel on his arm but still Axel so often feels like a will-o-whisp or a coked out fever dream of a seventies punk flashback even on stage._ _ _ _ _ _

______But a pointed glare from Len gets Axel moving again and they make pretty good progress. Takes them about an hour to get all the boxes into the room that will be Axel's._ _ _ _ _ _

______Cisco had had to move some of his DJ equipment into the kitchen but he'll figure the mess out._ _ _ _ _ _

______"Cisco.", Len says, motioning him outside._ _ _ _ _ _

______"Yeah?"_ _ _ _ _ _

______"Take care of him, ok?" And Len sounds genuinely concerned about Axel. He knows Len isn't actually as cold as the rumours say. Leonard Snart, guitarist for the the Rogues, Captain Cold, will not take you home after all._ _ _ _ _ _

______"Ok.", Cisco says. Len can be a dick but Cisco knows he cares more than he lets on. He's known Lisa well enough and for long enough to know that._ _ _ _ _ _

______They order Chinese food after Axel fits together an ikea bed and they find a new home for Cisco's turntable. Axel had brought beer, an amber lager from Central City Brewing Company. So they drink beer and eat noodles and Beetle stalks around for a while until abruptly Cisco hears her purring and he looks over in surprise. His hates everyone cat has climbed into Axel's lap and is purring contentedly._ _ _ _ _ _

______"What the fuck?", he says in surprise._ _ _ _ _ _

______Axel blinks, "Oh, the cat? My last rehab had a therapy cat program. Cats love me dude."_ _ _ _ _ _

______Cats may love Axel but he doesn't look particularly offended by the cat either._ _ _ _ _ _

______He'd known Axel had been in treatment, you couldn't know the Rogues without knowing Axel had a drug problem but he's surprised to hear Axel talk about it so openly anyway. Axel seems to realize he's surprised and he smiles, the crooked genuine smile, not the wicked sharp one that always preceded violence. And if the smile makes Cisco warm fuzzy to the point of his ears getting hot well he's not telling. "How's that going, anyway?"_ _ _ _ _ _

______Axel laughs, "Good, got 60 whole days plus the 90 I was in rehab."_ _ _ _ _ _

______"150 days. Impressive.", it actually is. He's not quite sure what Axel was taking, he'd heard rumours, meth, coke, heroin, all of the above but whatever it was he knows sobriety is hard. He's heard both Laurel and Roy complain._ _ _ _ _ _

______Axel smiles again, "Thanks." And then Axel leans over and kisses him, lips still damp with beer. And Cisco wasn't sure if whatever they had was going to last Axel moving in or if that was just going to make things awkward but this doesn't feel awkward, it feels right and he shoves a frightening rush of feels back where they belong in the box in the back of his mind. But now is not the time for a feelings talk, instead he swallows down Axel's breathy gasps and desperate whines as Cisco pulls his shirt over his head and he drinks in Axel's lean lanky frame. Tattooed over his heart is the curvy handwriting spelling James, and he touches the tattoo but the second his fingers find the raised ink Axel flinches away._ _ _ _ _ _

______"Shit sorry.", he says in surprise holding up his hands until the tension Axel is suddenly radiating starts to subside._ _ _ _ _ _

______"I'm gonna get that covered up.", Axel says finally._ _ _ _ _ _

______"Sara does good cover ups." He doesn't know if Axel knows Sara does cover ups for abuse victims. She did one for Hartley, covering up some scars Earl left, but the advice is true whether or not he's right but he remembers being with Hartley after Earl and he thinks he's right._ _ _ _ _ _

______Axel nods and then says, "Kiss me.", like the last five minutes didn't happen. But the "want to make something of it" fight is back in Axel's eyes and Cisco kisses him._ _ _ _ _ _

______***_ _ _ _ _ _

______He'd say bartending is his day job but he works from about 6 pm to 2 am so it's technically his night job. Teaching guitar lessons is also technically a day job but it at least actually happens in the daylight. He's mixing up an extra dirty martini for the hot blonde and she leans over to read his shirt. "I only fly solo?"_ _ _ _ _ _

______He laughs, "Debatable."_ _ _ _ _ _

______And he can _hear_ Hartley rolling his eyes as he flirts with the blond._ _ _ _ _ _

______"Hart!" And the distinctive voice is definitely Axel who all but throws himself over the bar into Hartley's space._ _ _ _ _ _

______"Dude you'd better be fucking sober.", Hartley says dryly and Axel gives him a sideways smile._ _ _ _ _ _

______"Stone cold. Or at least two beers?", the thing about Axel, Cisco has realized is that he has no guile. He wears his emotions on his face. It makes him dangerous absolutely, he's seen Axel attack people with bike chains before with no warning but that change in expression but it also makes him a pretty easy read. And he sees Hartley relax._ _ _ _ _ _

______"What can I get for you?", Hartley says, finally laughing._ _ _ _ _ _

______Axel grins, "Old Fashioned?"_ _ _ _ _ _

______Huh. That's interesting. "Sure.", Hartley says with a shrug and Axel hands him some bills._ _ _ _ _ _

______Axel has settled down at the bar and is idly chatting with Hartley when he sees Axel's head swivel towards the door and his face goes white as a sheet, like he's seen a ghost. "Ax?", Hartley says, worry decorating his face._ _ _ _ _ _

______Axel shakes his head, "Sorry, thought I saw someone I used to know."_ _ _ _ _ _

______***_ _ _ _ _ _

______He's barely in the door after his shift when Axel jumps him, all rough kisses and sharp nails. And he can't get that look on Axel's face out of his head when an alarm rings._ _ _ _ _ _

______Axel jumps back, "Fuck." And his hands are shaking as he takes his phone out of his pocket._ _ _ _ _ _

______"What's that?", he can't help but ask, since this is weird even by Axel standards._ _ _ _ _ _

______"Uh, medication alarm. I, uh, got diagnosed as bipolar when I was in rehab."_ _ _ _ _ _

______"Ah, ok.", that actually makes a lot of sense. "If it makes you feel better, I was diagnosed schizophrenic in high school.", he can't help but share, wanting to ease the vulnerable look on Axel's face._ _ _ _ _ _

______"Really?", Axel says in surprise._ _ _ _ _ _

______"Oh yeah, it was bad. Thought I could see the future and alternate worlds. Actually met both Barry and Caitlin in the psych ward in high school."_ _ _ _ _ _

______"Seriously? They're so ... Functional.", Axel says._ _ _ _ _ _

______"Time heals all wounds, my boy." And there's that closed off flicker in Axel's eyes again. The same one as when Cisco touched the tattoo and he pulls back with the instinctive knowledge that he's standing near a landmine. Axel slips off into his room in awkward silence. And Cisco sighs, lingering in the hallway for a few moment before heading to his room._ _ _ _ _ _

______***_ _ _ _ _ _

______The next morning Axel is back to Axel's version of normal and greets Cisco in his bleary eyed morning stupor not with "good morning" but with "Did you know Sid Vicious was probably queer?" as he looks over the book he's reading to smile at Cisco._ _ _ _ _ _

______Cisco blinks in surprise, “Uh yeah, I’d heard rumours.”_ _ _ _ _ _

______Beetle is nuzzled up to Axel’s side and he’s alternating between petting her and drinking his coffee when Cisco says, “Anything left in the pot?”_ _ _ _ _ _

______Axel nods, “Should be.” And he motions with his mug, a bright blue ceramic thing painted with stripes that almost looks homemade and Cisco heads over to a shockingly half full percolator._ _ _ _ _ _

______“You a Sid Vicious guy?”, he calls from the kitchen and he can hear Axel laughing._ _ _ _ _ _

______“What was your first clue, Ramon?” And ok, fair enough, Axel definitely gives off Sid Vicious vibes with the chains and the ripped clothes and the spiked hair._ _ _ _ _ _

______“That why you started playing bass?”, he calls as he finishes pouring his cup._ _ _ _ _ _

______Axel is silent for a moment and then says, “No, my foster mom thought it would keep me out of trouble.”_ _ _ _ _ _

______Now it’s Cisco’s turn to laugh as he settles down on the couch, Beetle vaguely sandwiched between their hips even as their knees touch and he thinks this might be the first casual non sexual contact he’s had with Axel in a while. He feels vaguely dramatic like a Victorian leading lady aghast by ankles and he chokes on his first sip of coffee. “She has met you right?”_ _ _ _ _ _

______“Yeah. I was 13 when I went to live with them. 16 when she gave me the bass.”_ _ _ _ _ _

______“And apparently had not realized no power in the verse could keep you out of trouble?”_ _ _ _ _ _

______“Apparently.”, and there’s a weird under current of bitterness in Axel’s voice but hey Cisco gets that not all foster parents can be Joe West so he figures Axel must have just had a worse experience than Barry. In the meantime, Beetle has jumped off the couch and the space between him and Axel suddenly looms large. Except Axel pulls his legs up and tosses them over Cisco’s lap. And Cisco suddenly realizes how _tall_ Axel is, at least 3 or 4 inches taller than him despite always slouching._ _ _ _ _ _

______But he leans into the contact anyway and doesn’t think about yesterday._ _ _ _ _ _

______***_ _ _ _ _ _

______The Rogues are doing a show at Rips, as a local opener and Cisco is tending bar with ear plugs in, weirdly it helps him only hear what he needs to hear but even he notices when Axel flubs a note and goes from eyefucking the crowd to looking literally anywhere. He gets back on tempo fast and spends the rest of the set white as a sheet and looking right at Len._ _ _ _ _ _

______Which is weird._ _ _ _ _ _

______Cisco turns back to customers, it’s him, Hartley and Barry on tap but the waitresses all get the night off because they don’t run table service during shows. The break between the Rogues set and the next group brings people mobbing to the bar for drinks and he’s mixing so fast he almost misses Axel purr, “Who do you have to blow to get a drink around here?”_ _ _ _ _ _

______“Me.”, he says with a laugh._ _ _ _ _ _

______“Ok, you want me to come back there or?”, and Axel’s voice has that weird high pitched giggly quality it takes on when he’s about to start a fight so Cisco looks around._ _ _ _ _ _

______“Bathroom. When the next set starts.” he hisses._ _ _ _ _ _

______And Axel grins, the wicked dangerous sharp smile and Hartley eyes him in concern._ _ _ _ _ _

______The ten minute wait between sets is killer and Cisco’s libido is definitely not taking advice from his uneasy mind, he’s rock hard with anticipation but as soon Bombshells starts playing he hands Hartley his towel and says, “I’m taking my break.”_ _ _ _ _ _

______If looks could kill honestly._ _ _ _ _ _

______Axel drags him into a stall and drops to his knees immediately and like yeah, Axel’s usually kind of an intense fuck but the energy is different. “Ax...”, he breathes._ _ _ _ _ _

______And Axel looks up at him, looking like sin incarnate with lips damp with saliva and precum and oh Cisco is definitely not strong enough to resist Axel Walker looking like _that_. Looking up at him from under his lashes, whispering "I want this." as he puts Cisco's hand on the back of his head and waits._ _ _ _ _ _

______And it's not like Cisco's never fucked away a bad day so he gives in, applies enough pressure to ease Axel forward and groans loudly. Probably embarrassingly loudly but whatever, embarrassment is for tomorrow Cisco._ _ _ _ _ _

______Not that tomorrow Cisco has that many regrets. Part of him is aware Axel is becoming more erratic and even as he tells himself Axel is always erratic it's not usually like this. However, tomorrow Cisco does have plans with Barry and Caitlin. Which takes him to Jitters at noon. Caitlin's obviously fresh from hair salon, her platinum all toned up and Barry waves. "Explain!", Caitlin calls._ _ _ _ _ _

______"After coffee!" Coffee is a cold brew red eye and then he settles into a stool. "Explain what?"_ _ _ _ _ _

______"Axel?", Caitlin says._ _ _ _ _ _

______He shrugs, "We fuck."_ _ _ _ _ _

______Caitlin looks at him, "You do you but really?"_ _ _ _ _ _

______It's not like they've been subtle per se but they have been trying to keep it low key. "He's actually like really smart and funny and even Beetle likes him!"_ _ _ _ _ _

______Barry gasps, "Dude, that cat hates everything."_ _ _ _ _ _

______"Right?"_ _ _ _ _ _

______Barry looks at him, "Dude, you're as bad as when Laurel is in town. You are fucking smit with him."_ _ _ _ _ _

______Cisco freezes. God dammit Allen. How the hell Barry fucking Allen who usually has a bad case of one track Iris West brain figure that out. And Caitlin looks at him closely and says "Holy shit he is."_ _ _ _ _ _

______He gives her a full on frosty look and Caitlin rolls her eyes, "Please, Cisco, I invented that look."_ _ _ _ _ _

______Barry looks at him, "Be careful. Len's never gone into detail but Axel's definitely got issues."_ _ _ _ _ _

______"Pot kettle suicide attempt.", Cisco points out and Barry flips him off as he takes a sip of his coffee. Caitlin is laughing at least._ _ _ _ _ _

______"He's a good roommate and the sex is good. Like I really can't complain. And I'm way more worried about him than me."_ _ _ _ _ _

______Shockingly that does not make either Barry or Caitlin look more relaxed._ _ _ _ _ _

______***_ _ _ _ _ _

______He doesn't see Axel at Rips which is abnormal but not super unusual. So he doesn't think much of it as he turns his key in the lock and then he hears, "Oh fuck please" as he turns on the light and gets an eyeful of Axel shirtless and straddling some guy on the couch. And then, "Shit, Cisco, sorry, lost track of time, we can head to my room."_ _ _ _ _ _

______Cisco nods awkwardly as Axel stands up, feeling weirdly flushed as the other guy looks at him equally awkwardly. "Sorry, Cisco.", Eddie says sheepishly. Cisco shrugs and then turns tail and locks himself in his room with his biggest pair of headphones on, doing some mixing with some weird techno Felicity has been working on and it mostly drowns out Axel's moans and cries but admittedly not enough._ _ _ _ _ _

______He's not jealous. He's really not a jealous guy, his partners being happy makes him happy. However he is definitely in love with Axel Walker. Fuck._ _ _ _ _ _

______So they should probably have a talk about hook ups only happening in the bedrooms. Uh... Hookups with other people he quickly mentally clarifies because they have definitely hooked up on the big red couch in their living room but this is definitely probably a talk they should have. Possibly they should have had this talk a few weeks ago but whatever._ _ _ _ _ _

______Eddie is gone when he wakes up. Instead Axel is sitting on the couch and when he sees Cisco he blurts out, "Sorry, I wasn't thinking about how weird that would be."_ _ _ _ _ _

______Cisco nods, "To be fair, neither did I. But for what it's worth, I'm ok with you banging other people. Just maybe not on the couch."_ _ _ _ _ _

______Axel nods. "Sounds fair."_ _ _ _ _ _

______"That's good. I like you but I don't "stop banging Laurel Lance" like you.", Cisco says laughing._ _ _ _ _ _

______That's honestly probably a lie. His mental l-word revelation is still ringing in his ear. Axel cracks up, "Dude, I so don't blame you for that."_ _ _ _ _ _

______Cisco feels a bit of the tension leave his shoulders._ _ _ _ _ _

______***_ _ _ _ _ _

______He doesn't stay relaxed for that long, Axel stays erratic and he's just getting off his shift when his phone rings. He has barely even taken off his apron but he sees Axel's name on his screen, "Ax?"_ _ _ _ _ _

______"Hey. Are you off work?"_ _ _ _ _ _

______"Yeah.", he says, turning to Hartley and mouthing _cover me?_._ _ _ _ _ _

______Hartley nods._ _ _ _ _ _

______"What's up?", he asks heading outside._ _ _ _ _ _

______Axel sighs on the other end, "I'm in Keystone trying to cop."_ _ _ _ _ _

______Fuck. How many days sober is Axel anyway. Cisco thinks (hopes, prays) he's over two hundred. "Any luck?", he tries to sound casual but he's not sure if he succeeds._ _ _ _ _ _

______"Called you, didn't I?", but Axel's laugh is strangled and Cisco hooks his phone up to his car's Bluetooth. "Can you come get me?"_ _ _ _ _ _

______"Yes.", he blurts out quickly, probably too quickly. But Axel rattles off an address and Cisco all but speeds to the other side of the Twin Cities. Axel is sitting on a step, hands in pockets as Cisco pulls up. "Want a ride, stranger?"_ _ _ _ _ _

______"Blow job's twenty.", Axel says, with that terrifying giggle and Cisco legitimately cannot tell if he's joking but he slips into the passenger seat. But Axel seems sober, erratic and maybe manic, but sober, his eyes look normal, his breathing seems normal._ _ _ _ _ _

______"You done that before?", he asks awkwardly._ _ _ _ _ _

______Axel nods, slouching in on himself more. "When I was low on cash."_ _ _ _ _ _

______Cisco can't think of what to do with his hands to convey that he isn't going to judge Axel but instead he uses his words and grips the steering wheel harder._ _ _ _ _ _

______"Can we go home?", Axel says finally and Cisco nods, throwing the car into drive._ _ _ _ _ _

______They're silent for a few moments and then Axel says, "Everyone thinks James was my boyfriend. But that's not quite right. He's actually my foster father."_ _ _ _ _ _

______Cisco stalls the car. "What?"_ _ _ _ _ _

Axel flinches. "He didn't lay a hand on me until I was 18 but by the time I was 18 I wanted it... _him_ so bad I crawled into his bed the night I turned 18 and he had me. I _wanted_ it."

____

____

______Cisco does not point out the double entendre. But he does say, "You were a kid, you were thirteen when you moved in, he groomed you. He's a monster, not you.", hisses it with a venom that would make Lisa Snart proud._ _ _ _ _ _

______"I started taking drugs in high school to slow down or speed up depending on the day and he liked me high because it made me easier to manage. And Zoey was happy to look the other way to keep him happy."_ _ _ _ _ _

______"Jesus. Babe.", Cisco breathes. It's been a long time since he's been angry enough to hurt. Since Earl nearly killed Hartley. He doesn't even register the pet name. All he's registering is an overwhelming, total rage_ _ _ _ _ _

______"He's been stalking me. Calling me, showing up at shows or Rips and I don't know what to do.", Axel is looking anywhere but at him._ _ _ _ _ _

______"We'll call Eddie or Joe, get him arrested, get a restraining order. There has got be something we can do.", he wishes he could hold Axel's hand but he drives stick so he focuses on that as Axel talks, about rehab and the therapist who insisted he needed to get Jesse out of his life._ _ _ _ _ _

______"That's why you moved in with Len and Mick?"_ _ _ _ _ _

______Axel nods, "Yeah. James would never dare go there."_ _ _ _ _ _

______Fair enough. He knows Len and Mick gave Earl the mother of all revenge beatdowns before they knew if Hartley was going to wake up._ _ _ _ _ _

______"You know Sara does free cover ups for abuse victims?", Cisco says finally._ _ _ _ _ _

______And Axel finally sounds like himself when he says, "I know, I work with her."_ _ _ _ _ _

______Cisco laughs, "I mean if it's too personal you don't have to see her but she's good."_ _ _ _ _ _

______Axel nods, "I should text her. I want to cover it up. Get it off me, y'know?". And the quiet vulnerability in Axel's voice is heartbreaking as he pulls into the parking garage of his apartment._ _ _ _ _ _

______They head upstairs in silence and Cisco can't figure out if he should hug him or kiss him or back the fuck off or what and he's flailing in his internal monologue when Axel kisses him, "We don't have to ... y'know fuck but..."_ _ _ _ _ _

______"Fuck the pain away?", he jokes and the somber moment is lifted just a little bit._ _ _ _ _ _

______"Hey, Drive Angry is a great movie.", Axel says defensively. Cisco smiles._ _ _ _ _ _

______"It totally is. You, me, beer and a movie sometime?" And that's like actually a date, or something wow._ _ _ _ _ _

______"Fuck yeah.", Axel kisses him, almost chaste especially by Axel's general rough and tumble, fuck me like you hate me tendencies._ _ _ _ _ _

______They end mostly naked in Cisco's bed, kissing and touching with a slowness and tenderness that he's never shared with Axel. He can't even look at the curving letters without his stomach twisting. But Axel is warm in his arm, lanky frame sprawled out and nearly pushing Cisco off the bed. There's a sudden flop and suddenly he realizes that Beetle has nuzzled his way next to Cisco's pillow. Axel laughs and reaches over to pet the purring cat. "Hey, we should sleep?, Cisco says awkwardly and Axel looks at him._ _ _ _ _ _

______"Uh, sure." And Axel is looking anywhere but at him again and he slips out of the bed._ _ _ _ _ _

______"I mean you can sleep here?", Cisco blurts out._ _ _ _ _ _

______Axel freezes on his way out the door. "I uh...sure."_ _ _ _ _ _

______Cisco kicks the covers aside enough for Axel to crawl in beside him and sending Beetle fleeing again. And despite Axel being not insignificantly taller, he pulls all his limbs in enough to be a very passable little spoon as Cisco lets an arm rest casually on Axel's waist._ _ _ _ _ _

______***_ _ _ _ _ _

______Technically Legends Tattoo opens at noon but he and Axel are there for Axel's appointment at 8 am. Sara had explained it was to make people more comfortable, in case they panic and start crying. As she is currently explaining to Axel as she applies the transfer, "You need to cry or panic or just stop for a bit let me know ok?"_ _ _ _ _ _

______Axel nods and Sara looks at him, "Want to see?". The full length mirror that generally leans against the wall by Sara's station has been covered up and Axel shakes his head._ _ _ _ _ _

______"Ok, then we are good to go!", Sara says, laying out her inks._ _ _ _ _ _

______Cisco has a tattoo of a design he concocted when he was crazy, a big watercolour one on his arm that Axel gave him. Axel had talked the whole time. He's silent however while Sara works, the buzz of the needle complemented only by some soothing Arabic music Sara is playing. And Cisco wants to talk but it doesn't feel right. But as Sara's needle begins to shade over that monster's name, Axel breaks into nervous manic giggles and fumbles for Cisco's hand which he gives easily as he watches tiny segments of ink and blood mix on Axel's chest until the last curvy letter is blocked from sight._ _ _ _ _ _

______"Want a picture?", Sara asks, as she dabs away the last bit of visible blood. Cisco takes it in. A night sky swirls not just over Axel's heart but spreading over his pec with the tragedy and comedy masks in the centre._ _ _ _ _ _

______Axel shakes his head and Sara stands, "Ready to see?"_ _ _ _ _ _

______Finally Axel seems to find his voice again, "Hell yeah." and Cisco is briefly startled by the noise._ _ _ _ _ _

______Sara pulls the silky Moroccan blanket off the mirror and Axel stands, his legs a little shaky under him as Cisco reaches out in case he faints but he doesn't, he stands tall in front of the mirror and he smiles, the beautiful genuine one. And breathes out, a loud exhale that sounds like the weight of the world has been lifted. "Thank you, Sara."_ _ _ _ _ _

______She smiles, "Of course. Enjoy freedom." And she wraps the tattoo, a square of blue medical paper, taped from Axel's protruding collar bone to the top of his bony ribs._ _ _ _ _ _

______"It looks amazing.", Cisco blurts out as Axel pulls his shirt back on and Axel smiles._ _ _ _ _ _

______"It does."_ _ _ _ _ _

______And they're walking back to the car when Cisco realizes Axel is shaking. "You ok?"_ _ _ _ _ _

______Axel nods, "Adrenaline shock. Wouldn't mind an energy drink and a cliff bar."_ _ _ _ _ _

______"Or...", Cisco says with a laugh, "We can grab you an energy drink and then go home and make lunch properly!"_ _ _ _ _ _

______The distracted look in Axel's eyes is screaming that there is more to this than just a low blood sugar but he watches as Axel pays for a fruity Rockstar and slides into the car. Cisco throws the car back into drive. And Axel laughs, "Babe, you should race this thing."_ _ _ _ _ _

______Cisco's heart stutter stops and he says, "As a responsible citizen I must deny any implication that Wally West and I have street raced."_ _ _ _ _ _

______Axel grins, "Well that's hot."_ _ _ _ _ _

______It's weird, Cisco thinks, but Axel almost literally looks lighter, he's less slouched over, resting loose limbed in Cisco's passenger seat. "Glad you think so."_ _ _ _ _ _

______"What can I saw, I like bad boys._ _ _ _ _ _

______"Mick?", Cisco teases. He's seen Axel's blatant flirting after all_ _ _ _ _ _

______"I plead the fifth.", Axel says, clapping his hands as he laughs._ _ _ _ _ _

______***_ _ _ _ _ _

______He's behind the bar at Rips, listening to Meteors game on the tv and half talking to Hartley when he hears, "Hey fuck off." And that is definitely Axel's voice. He looks at Hartley who nods and he immediately starts looking for Ronnie as he pushes his way through the crowd. He does make eye contact with Ronnie and jerks his head in the direction of a confrontation._ _ _ _ _ _

______It is Axel and an older guy, like way older, who looks like he's trying to maneuver Axel out the door._ _ _ _ _ _

______"James...", Axel says, voice kind of strangled, eyes a little wild._ _ _ _ _ _

______And the fucking scumbag, monster, waste of air says, "Hey, why don't I take you down to Keystone, bet they miss you."_ _ _ _ _ _

______"No.", Axel says and he finally makes eye contact with Cisco._ _ _ _ _ _

______Who says, "Unfortunately we're going to have to ask you to leave."_ _ _ _ _ _

______James looks at him and plasters on a kindly parental smile, "Sorry, there's been a mistake, I'm just trying get my boy to come home."_ _ _ _ _ _

______It takes actual effort not to vomit. Unfortunately that takes all the effort away from not punching and he decks James just as Ronnie gets there._ _ _ _ _ _

______"I called the cops.", Ronnie says and Axel is physically shaking again._ _ _ _ _ _

______Joe takes statements but they don't have anything to hold him on. But Axel does file a restraining order so that's an achievement._ _ _ _ _ _

______They're in the car on the way home when Axel says, "They can't charge him with sex crimes because I was technically legal."_ _ _ _ _ _

______Cisco is surprised and blurts out, "Not even the blatant grooming?"_ _ _ _ _ _

______Axel shrugs, "Guess not?"_ _ _ _ _ _

______"Hey, Joe will do his best. He's good people."_ _ _ _ _ _

______Axel nods and when they get home Cisco is again at a loss of what to do when Axel blurts out, "Can I sleep in your room."_ _ _ _ _ _

______"Yeah. Yeah.", Cisco says sharply._ _ _ _ _ _

______He ends up with Axel shirtless in his bed, and as he plays with Axel's hair it just slips out, "I love you."_ _ _ _ _ _

______Axel freezes, "Cisco?"_ _ _ _ _ _

______"I do.", he says finally. "I love you. I don't want to be exclusive but I love you."_ _ _ _ _ _

______That seems to relax Axel who nuzzles close and whispers, "I think I love you too."_ _ _ _ _ _

______It's not an unqualified I love you but then again Cisco didn't need it to be._ _ _ _ _ _

______***_ _ _ _ _ _

______Laurel comes to visit for his birthday and they go to Rips because apparently even when he's not At Work, he's at work but Cisco is too busy with Ray and Mick's fiery cake concoction to realize they've worked out a plan._ _ _ _ _ _

______Laurel slips up beside him as Axel sidles up on the other side and says, "Hey, birthday boy, let's say we take you home."_ _ _ _ _ _

**Author's Note:**

> Come visit! Notsolittlegirlevenmorelost.tumblr.com


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